Twelfth Night, Act 1, Scene 5

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Twelfth Night: Act 1, Scene 5

	Enter MARIA and Clown

	MARIA
1.5.1	Nay, either tell me where thou hast been, or
	I will not open my lips so wide as a bristle may
	enter, in way of thy excuse. My lady will hang
	thee for thy absence.

	Clown
1.5.5	Let her hang me: he that is well hanged in this
	world needs to fear no colours.	colours deceptions, with a pun on
		"collars," hangman's nooses
	MARIA
	Make that good.	Make that good prove it

	Clown
	He shall see none to fear.	He shall see none to fear
		(Because he'll be dead.)
	MARIA
	A good lenten answer: I can tell thee where	lenten meager (Like food during Lent.
1.5.10	that saying was born, of "I fear no colours."	Maria means it's a lame joke.)

	Clown
	Where, good Mistress Mary?

	MARIA
	In the wars; and that may you be bold to say	In the wars ("coulours" = the banner of a
	in your foolery.	military unit)

	Clown
	Well, God give them wisdom that have
1.5.15	it; and that are fools, let them use their talents.	God give them . . . their talents >>>

	MARIA
	Yet you will be hanged for being so long
	absent, or to be turned away—is not that	turned away sent packing
	as good as a hanging to you?

	Clown
	Many a good hanging prevents a bad marriage;	Many . . . bad marriage (A proverb.)
1.5.20	and, for turning away, let summer bear it out.	let summer bear it out i.e., It will be
		easy to be out of the house in the warm weather.
	MARIA
	You are resolute, then?

	Clown
	Not so, neither; but I am resolved on two
	points—	points (Another meaning of "points" is
		"laces used to hold up breeches.")
	MARIA
	That if one break, the other will hold; or, if both
1.5.25	break, your gaskins fall.	gaskins breeches

	Clown
	Apt, in good faith; very apt. Well, go thy way; if	apt well done, very witty (But the Clown is
	Sir Toby would leave drinking, thou wert as witty	being ironic.)
	a piece of Eve's flesh as any in Illyria.	if Sir Toby . . . in Illyria >>>

	MARIA
	Peace, you rogue, no more o' that. Here comes
1.5.30	my lady: make your excuse wisely, you were
	best.

	Exit MARIA

	Clown
	Wit, an't be thy will, put me into good fooling!
	Those wits, that think they have thee, do very oft	thee i.e., wit
	prove fools; and I, that am sure I lack thee, may
1.5.35	pass for a wise man: for what says Quinapalus?	Quinapalus An authority, invented by the clown.
	"Better a witty fool, than a foolish wit."

	Enter OLIVIA with MALVOLIO
	and Attendants

	God bless thee, lady!

	OLIVIA
	Take the fool away.

	Clown
	Do you not hear, fellows? Take away the
1.5.40	lady.

	OLIVIA
	Go to, you're a dry fool; I'll no more of you.	Go to get outta here, drop dead, etc. \| dry dull
	besides, you grow dishonest.	dishonest unreliable, wicked

	Clown
	Two faults, madonna, that drink and good	madonna (A fancy way of saying "My Lady,"
	counsel will amend; for give the dry fool drink, then is	from the Italian, mia donna.)
1.5.45	the fool not dry; bid the dishonest man mend himself:	mend reform
	if he mend, he is no longer dishonest; if he cannot, let
	the botcher mend him. Any thing that's mended is but	botcher mender of shoes or clothes
	patched; virtue that transgresses is but patched with
	sin, and sin that amends is but patched with virtue.
1.5.50	If that this simple syllogism will serve, so; if it will not,
	what remedy? As there is no true cuckold but	cuckold a man sexually betrayed by his wife
	calamity, so beauty's a flower. The lady bade take away	As there . . . so beauty's a flower >>>
	the fool, therefore, I say again, take her away.

	OLIVIA
	Sir, I bade them take away you.

	Clown
1.5.55	Misprision in the highest degree! Lady, "Cucullus non	misprision arrest of the wrong person
	facit monachum ": that's as much to say as I wear not	*Cucullus . . . monachum* the cowl does not make
	motley in my brain. Good madonna, give me leave	the monk \| motley multi-colored clothing of fools
	to prove you a fool.	(The Clown's point is that his thinking isn't
		foolish.)
	OLIVIA
	Can you do it?

	Clown
1.5.60	Dexteriously, good madonna.	dexteriously dexterously

	OLIVIA
	Make your proof.

	Clown
	I must catechise you for it, madonna: good my mouse	catechise question methodically
	of virtue, answer me.	good my mouse of virtue my good virtuous
		mouse
	OLIVIA
	Well, sir, for want of other idleness,	want of other idleness lack of any other way
1.5.65	I'll bide your proof.	of wasting time \| bide endure, put up with

	Clown
	Good madonna, why mournest thou?

	OLIVIA
	Good fool, for my brother's death.

	Clown
	I think his soul is in hell, madonna.

	OLIVIA
	I know his soul is in heaven, fool.

	Clown
1.5.70	The more fool, madonna, to mourn for your
	brother's soul being in heaven. Take away the
	fool, gentlemen.

	OLIVIA
	What think you of this fool, Malvolio? doth
	he not mend?	mend improve (She thinks the Clown is becoming
		more amusing.)
	MALVOLIO
1.5.75	Yes, and shall do till the pangs of death shake	Yes (He thinks the Clown is becoming more
	him. Infirmity, that decays the wise, doth ever	foolish.) \| Infirmity . . . better fool. Sickness
	make the better fool.	and age always make a fool "better" (by making
		him more foolish)
	Clown
	God send you, sir, a speedy infirmity, for the
	better increasing your folly! Sir Toby will be
1.5.80	sworn that I am no fox; but he will not pass his	fox crafty person \| pass pledge
	word for two pence that you are no fool.	pence pennies

	OLIVIA
	How say you to that, Malvolio?

	MALVOLIO
	I marvel your ladyship takes delight in such a barren
	rascal. I saw him put down the other day with	with by
1.5.85	an ordinary fool that has no more brain than a stone.	ordinary fool natural fool, idiot
	Look you now, he's out of his guard already. Unless	out of his guard off his game, without a witty reply
	you laugh and minister occasion to him, he is gagged.	minister occasion provide openings (for his jests)
	I protest, I take these wise men, that crow so at these	protest declare \| crow laugh loudly
	set kind of fools, no better than the fools' zanies.	set kind of fools professional fools
		zanies sidekicks
	OLIVIA
1.5.90	Oh, you are sick of self-love, Malvolio, and taste	of with
	with a distempered appetite. To be generous,	distempered sickly
	guiltless and of free disposition, is to take those	free open-minded
	things for bird-bolts that you deem cannon-bullets:	bird-bolts blunt arrows for shooting birds
	there is no slander in an allowed fool, though he do	allowed fool licensed fool, one allowed to say
1.5.95	nothing but rail; nor no railing in a known discreet	anything \| rail scold, satirize
	man, though he do nothing but reprove.	a known discreet man a man known to have good
		judgment
	Clown
	Now Mercury endue thee with leasing, for thou	Mercury (god of guile) \| endue endow
	speakest well of fools!	leasing lying
		(In other words, "as a reward for speaking well
	Re-enter MARIA	of fools, may Mercury give you the gift of lying.")

	MARIA
	Madam, there is at the gate a young gentleman
1.5.100	much desires to speak with you.

	OLIVIA
	From the Count Orsino, is it?

	MARIA
	I know not, madam: 'tis a fair young man,
	and well attended.	well attended accompanied by a good number
		of servants (But when the "gentleman" (Viola)
	OLIVIA	appears, he/she is alone.)
	Who of my people hold him in delay?

	MARIA
1.5.105	Sir Toby, madam, your kinsman.

	OLIVIA
	Fetch him off, I pray you; he speaks nothing but
	madman: fie on him!	speaks nothing but madman talks crazy

	Exit MARIA

	Go you, Malvolio: if it be a suit from the count, I	suit request, plea
	am sick, or not at home; what you will, to dismiss it.	what you will say whatever you want

	Exit MALVOLIO

1.5.110	Now you see, sir, how your fooling grows old, and
	people dislike it.

	Clown
	Thou hast spoke for us, madonna, as if thy eldest	us i.e., fools
	son should be a fool; whose skull Jove cram with	as if thy eldest son should be a fool as if you
	brains! for—here he comes—one of thy kin has a	wanted your oldest son to go into the fool business
1.5.115	most weak pia mater.	*pia mater* brain

	Enter SIR TOBY BELCH

	OLIVIA
	By mine honour, half drunk. What is he at	What what sort of man
	the gate, cousin?

	SIR TOBY BELCH
	A gentleman.

	OLIVIA
	A gentleman! What gentleman?

	SIR TOBY BELCH
1.5.120	'Tis a gentle man here—a plague o' these
	pickle-herring! How now, sot!	sot drunkard, fool >>>

	Clown
	Good Sir Toby!

	OLIVIA
	Cousin, cousin, how have you come so early
	by this lethargy?	lethargy drunken stupor

	SIR TOBY BELCH
1.5.125	Lechery! I defy lechery. There's one at
	the gate.

	OLIVIA
	Ay, marry, what is he?

	SIR TOBY BELCH
	Let him be the devil, an he will, I care not;	an he will if he wants to
	give me faith, say I. Well, it's all one.	faith religious faith (to protect him against the
		devil) \| it's all one it doesn't matter, whatever, etc.
	Exit SIR TOBY BELCH

	OLIVIA
1.5.130	What's a drunken man like, fool?

	Clown
	Like a drowned man, a fool and a mad man.
	One draught above heat makes him a fool,	One draught above heat one drink more than
	the second mads him; and a third drowns him.	what it takes to make one pleasantly warm

	OLIVIA
	Go thou and seek the crowner, and let him sit	crowner coroner
1.5.135	o' my coz; for he's in the third degree of drink,	sit o' hold an inquest concerning \| coz Short for
	he's drowned. Go, look after him.	"cousin," which means "kinsman." (Olivia's joke
		is that because Toby is dead drunk, he's a case for
	Clown	the coroner.)
	He is but mad yet, madonna; and the fool shall
	look to the madman.

	Exit Clown

	Re-enter MALVOLIO

	MALVOLIO
	Madam, yond young fellow swears he will speak
1.5.140	with you. I told him you were sick; he takes on him
	to understand so much, and therefore comes to	therefore for that very reason
	speak with you. I told him you were asleep; he seems
	to have a foreknowledge of that too, and therefore
	comes to speak with you. What is to be said to
1.5.145	him, lady? he's fortified against any denial.

	OLIVIA
	Tell him he shall not speak with me.

	MALVOLIO
	H'as been told so; and he says, he'll stand at your	H'as he has
	door like a sheriff's post, and be the supporter to	sheriff's post a post standing at the door of a
	a bench, but he'll speak with you.	sheriff's office, used for posting official notices

	OLIVIA
1.5.150	What kind o' man is he?

	MALVOLIO
	Why, of mankind.	of mankind human (Malvolio sees nothing
		special about Viola/Cesario.)
	OLIVIA
	What manner of man?

	MALVOLIO
	Of very ill manner; he'll speak with you,
	will you or no.

	OLIVIA
1.5.155	Of what personage and years is he?	personage appearance

	MALVOLIO
	Not yet old enough for a man, nor young enough
	for a boy; as a squash is before 'tis a peascod, or	squash unripe pea pod \| peascod pea pod
	a codling when 'tis almost an apple. 'Tis with him	codling unripe apple
	in standing water, between boy and man. He is	in standing water at the turn of the tide
1.5.160	very well-favoured and he speaks very shrewishly.	well-favoured good-looking \| shrewishly sharply
	One would think his mother's milk were scarce
	out of him.

	OLIVIA
	Let him approach: call in my gentlewoman.

	MALVOLIO
	Gentlewoman, my lady calls.

	Exit MALVOLIO

	Re-enter MARIA

	OLIVIA
1.5.165	Give me my veil; come, throw it o'er my face.
	We'll once more hear Orsino's embassy.

	Enter VIOLA

	VIOLA
	The honourable lady of the house, which is she?

	OLIVIA
	Speak to me; I shall answer for her.
	Your will?

	VIOLA
1.5.170	Most radiant, exquisite and unmatchable beauty—
	I pray you, tell me if this be the lady of the house,
	for I never saw her: I would be loath to cast away	I would be loath to cast away I would hate to
	my speech, for besides that it is excellently well	waste
	penned, I have taken great pains to con it. Good	con memorize
1.5.175	beauties, let me sustain no scorn; I am very
	comptible, even to the least sinister usage.	comptible sensitive
		the least sinister usage the slightest disrespect
	OLIVIA
	Whence came you, sir?	Whence from what family or country (Olivia is
		taking a personal interest in this young gentleman.)
	VIOLA
	I can say little more than I have studied, and that
	question's out of my part. Good gentle one, give me	out of my part not part of the role I'm supposed
1.5.180	modest assurance if you be the lady of the house,	to play \| modest serious, sincere
	that I may proceed in my speech.

	OLIVIA
	Are you a comedian?	comedian actor

	VIOLA
	No, my profound heart: and yet, by the very fangs	profound very wise
	of malice I swear, I am not that I play. Are you
1.5.185	the lady of the house?

	OLIVIA
	If I do not usurp myself, I am.	usurp wrongly take the place of

	VIOLA
	Most certain, if you are she, you do usurp
	yourself; for what is yours to bestow is not yours	what is yours to bestow i.e., love
	to reserve. But this is from my commission; I will	reserve keep back >>>
1.5.190	on with my speech in your praise, and then show	from my commission outside the limits
	you the heart of my message.	of my instructions

	OLIVIA
	Come to what is important in't: I forgive you	forgive excuse from a duty
	the praise.

	VIOLA
	Alas, I took great pains to study it, and
1.5.195	'tis poetical.

	OLIVIA
	It is the more like to be feigned: I pray you,	feigned pretended, insincere
	keep it in. I heard you were saucy at my gates,	keep it in keep it to yourself
	and allowed your approach rather to wonder at you	approach i.e., this interview with me
	than to hear you. If you be not mad, be gone; if	If you be not mad, be gone >>>
1.5.200	you have reason, be brief: 'tis not that time of	reason rationality, sanity
	moon with me to make one in so skipping a dialogue.	time of phase of the >>> \| make one in take part in
		skipping flighty, helter-skelter
	MARIA
	Will you hoist sail, sir? Here lies your way.	Here lies your way i.e., you can go out this way
		(Maria is probably pointing to the door.)
	VIOLA
	No, good swabber; I am to hull here a little	swabber ship's petty officer, in charge of keeping
	longer. Some mollification for your giant, sweet	the decks clean \| hull drift with sails furled
1.5.205	lady. Tell me your mind—I am a messenger.	Some mollification for your giant i.e., call off
		your guardian giant (Maria is tiny.)
	OLIVIA
	Sure, you have some hideous matter to deliver,
	when the courtesy of it is so fearful. Speak your office.	courtesy of introduction to \| fearful frightening
		office business
	VIOLA
	It alone concerns your ear. I bring no overture	overture declaration
	of war, no taxation of homage: I hold the olive	taxation of homage demand for tribute
1.5.210	in my hand; my words are as full of peace as	olive i.e., olive branch of peace
	matter.	matter important meaning

	OLIVIA
	Yet you began rudely. What are you? What
	would you?

	VIOLA
	The rudeness that hath appeared in me have I
1.5.215	learned from my entertainment. What I am, and	entertainment (rude) reception (by your people)
	what I would, are as secret as maidenhead: to	maidenhead virginity, the hymen
	your ears, divinity, to any other's, profanation.

	OLIVIA
	Give us the place alone: we will hear this
	divinity.

	Exeunt MARIA and Attendants

1.5.220	Now, sir, what is your text?	your text gospel passage upon which you will
		preach (Olivia mockingly takes "divinity" to mean
	VIOLA	"a sermon.")
	Most sweet lady—

	OLIVIA
	A comfortable doctrine, and much may be said	comfortable full of comfort
	of it. Where lies your text?

	VIOLA
	In Orsino's bosom.

	OLIVIA
1.5.225	In his bosom! In what chapter of his bosom?

	VIOLA
	To answer by the method, in the first of his	by the method following the usual way (of
	heart.	beginning a sermon)

	OLIVIA
	O, I have read it; it is heresy. Have you no
	more to say?

	VIOLA
1.5.230	Good madam, let me see your face.

	OLIVIA
	Have you any commission from your lord to
	negotiate with my face? You are now out of your
	text; but we will draw the curtain and show you the	out of your text wandering away from your topic
	picture. Look you, sir, such a one I was this present.	this present at the present time

	Unveiling

1.5.235	Is't not well done?

	VIOLA
	Excellently done, if God did all.	if God did all (Cesario/Viola is hinting that Olivia
		might be using a lot of make-up.)
	OLIVIA
	'Tis in grain, sir; 'twill endure wind and	in grain i.e., not painted on
	weather.

	VIOLA
	'Tis beauty truly blent, whose red and white	blent blended
1.5.240	Nature's own sweet and cunning hand laid on:	cunning skillful
	Lady, you are the cruell'st she alive,	she woman
	If you will lead these graces to the grave
	And leave the world no copy.	If . . . And leave the world no copy >>>

	OLIVIA
	O, sir, I will not be so hard-hearted; I will give out
1.5.245	divers schedules of my beauty. It shall be inventoried,	divers several \| schedules itemized lists (Such a list
	and every particle and utensil labelled to my will:	is also a "copy.") \| particle and utensil i.e., every
	as, item, two lips, indifferent red; item, two grey eyes,	little thing \| labelled to my will added as a codicil
	with lids to them; item, one neck, one chin, and	to my will \| indifferent more or less
	so forth.Were you sent hither to praise me?	praise (Puns on "appraise.")

	VIOLA
1.5.250	I see you what you are, you are too proud;
	But, if you were the devil, you are fair.	if even if \| the devil i.e., the proudest creature
	My lord and master loves you. O, such love	that ever lived
	Could be but recompensed, though you were crown'd	but recompensed only fairly repaid
	The nonpareil of beauty!	nonpareil one without an equal >>>

	OLIVIA
	How does he love me?

	VIOLA
1.5.255	With adorations, fertile tears,	fertile ever-growing
	With groans that thunder love, with sighs of fire.

	OLIVIA
	Your lord does know my mind; I cannot love him:
	Yet I suppose him virtuous, know him noble,	suppose believe as a fact
	Of great estate, of fresh and stainless youth;	Of great estate wealthy and important
1.5.260	In voices well divulged, free, learn'd and valiant;	stainless unstained \| In voices well divulged well
	And in dimension and the shape of nature	spoken of \| free generous
	A gracious person. But yet I cannot love him.	dimension and the shape of nature physique
	He might have took his answer long ago.	gracious person pleasing figure of a man

	VIOLA
	If I did love you in my master's flame,	in my master's flame with my master's passion
1.5.265	With such a suffering, such a deadly life,	deadly life death in life
	In your denial I would find no sense;
	I would not understand it.

	OLIVIA
	Why, what would you?

	VIOLA
	Make me a willow cabin at your gate,	willow (Willow was a symbol of unrequited love.)
	And call upon my soul within the house;	my soul i.e., Olivia
1.5.270	Write loyal cantons of contemned love	cantons cantos, songs \| contemned rejected
	And sing them loud even in the dead of night;
	Halloo your name to the reverberate hills	reverberate resounding
	And make the babbling gossip of the air	the babbling gossip of the air echo
	Cry out "Olivia!" O, You should not rest
1.5.275	Between the elements of air and earth,	Between . . . air and earth i.e., anywhere
	But you should pity me!	But you should pity me until you came to pity me

	OLIVIA
	You might do much.
	What is your parentage?

	VIOLA
	Above my fortunes, yet my state is well:	Above better than \| my fortunes what I happen to
	I am a gentleman.	be at the moment \| my state is well i.e., I'm satisfied
		with my present position.
	OLIVIA
	Get you to your lord;
1.5.280	I cannot love him; let him send no more—
	Unless, perchance, you come to me again,
	To tell me how he takes it. Fare you well.
	I thank you for your pains. Spend this for me.	Spend this for me (She offers Cesario/Viola a tip.)

	VIOLA
	I am no fee'd post, lady; keep your purse;	fee'd post paid messenger
1.5.285	My master, not myself, lacks recompense.
	Love make his heart of flint that you shall love;	Love . . . love May Love make the man with whom
	And let your fervor, like my master's, be	you fall in love have a heart of flint.
	Placed in contempt! Farewell, fair cruelty.	fair cruelty beautiful cruel one

	Exit VIOLA

	OLIVIA
	"What is your parentage?"
1.5.290	"Above my fortunes, yet my state is well:
	I am a gentleman." I'll be sworn thou art;
	Thy tongue, thy face, thy limbs, actions and spirit,	tongue manner of speaking
	Do give thee five-fold blazon. Not too fast! Soft, soft!	five-fold blazon >>> \| Soft hold on, go slowly
	Unless the master were the man. How now!	the man the man-servant of the master >>>
1.5.295	Even so quickly may one catch the plague?	the plague i.e., love-sickness
	Methinks I feel this youth's perfections
	With an invisible and subtle stealth
	To creep in at mine eyes. Well, let it be.
	What ho, Malvolio!

	Re-enter MALVOLIO

	MALVOLIO
	Here, madam, at your service.

	OLIVIA
1.5.300	Run after that same peevish messenger,
	The County's man. He left this ring behind him,	County's Count's, i.e., Duke Orsino's
	Would I or not. Tell him I'll none of it.	Would I or not whether I wanted it or not (She's
	Desire him not to flatter with his lord,	lying; Viola left no ring.)
	Nor hold him up with hopes. I am not for him.	flatter with his lord i.e., flatter Orsino with the
1.5.305	If that the youth will come this way to-morrow,	idea that he still has a chance to win Olivia's love
	I'll give him reasons for't. Hie thee, Malvolio.	reasons for't i.e., reasons why she cannot love
		Orsino \| Hie hasten
	MALVOLIO
	Madam, I will.

	Exit MALVOLIO

	OLIVIA
	I do I know not what, and fear to find
	Mine eye too great a flatterer for my mind.	flatterer seducer, tempter
1.5.310	Fate, show thy force: ourselves we do not owe;	owe own
1.5.311	What is decreed must be, and be this so.	be this so (She hopes that love between herself
		and the young gentleman is one of those things
	Exit OLIVIA	that fate has decreed.)

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